In Their Eyes

     I was driving down the road today with only two-year-old Macy with me in the van.  She's my fouth child, my third daughter.  I didn't plan to have a fourth child, but God laid it on my heart to have one more child.  I can't imagine life without her.  We were talking about random things...okay, she was talking about every little thing and I was half listening.  The radio was on and the song "In My Daughter's Eyes" came on.  I started listening and soon realized that Macy's non-stop chatting had stopped.  I looked in the mirror where she sat in her carseat right behind me.  Our eyes met.  She said "Turn it up, Momma.  I like this"  We listened to the song, a tear-jerking story of the relationship of a mother and daughter. I remembered, one more time that day, how very blessed I am.

     I remembered that my actions speak louder than words in the world of my children.  They are always watching me.  It's the reason I try to bite back the angry words when someone cuts me off in traffic, or why I choke back the bitterness when I'm hurt or frustrated.  Why I try to smile at everyone and make an effort to always be polite, even when I don't feel like it.  I have little eyes watching me, and I am their role model in life, at least for now.  I know all about hypocricy, and how clear it is to children.  I'm not going to change the world, but if I can be a positive influence in the eyes of my children, then I have left my legacy.

In My Daughter's Eyes- Martina McBride

In my daughter's eyes I am a hero

  I am strong and wise and I know no fear

  But the truth is plain to see

  She was sent to rescue me

  I see who I wanna be in my daughter's eyes

In my daughter's eyes everyone is equal

 Darkness turns to light and the world is at peace

 It's miracle God gave to me

Gives me strength when I am weak

I find reason to believe in my daughter's eyes

And when she wraps her hand around my finger

 Oh, it puts a smile in my heart

Everything becomes a little clearer

 I realize what life is all about

It's hangin' on when your heart has had enough

 It's giving more when you feel like giving up

 I've seen the light

 It's in my daughter's eyes

In my daughter's eyes I can see the future

 A reflection of who I am and what will be

 An' though she'll grow and someday leave, maybe raise a family

 When I'm gone I hope you see how happy she made me

 For I'll be there in my daughter's eyes

Read more: MARTINA MCBRIDE - IN MY DAUGHTER'S EYES LYRICS http://www.metrolyrics.com/in-my-daughters-eyes-lyrics-martina-mcbride.html#ixzz25kIafrNk
Copied from MetroLyrics.com

The Olympic Experience

I anxiously counted down to the start of the 2012 London Olympics.  Not only do I love the Olympics, but the Summer Olympics are by far my favorite and this time they were located in a city I would LOVE to visit someday.  I enjoyed watching every minute of it.

I appreciate the two and a half weeks of the Olympics.  Not only is history made, but it is a time of 'peace'.  It is a distraction, perhaps, from life around us.  For just two weeks we can push aside politics and wars in foreign lands and just cheer for the home team.  At this time, we Americans are all cheering for the same team.  We're united as a country in our desire to see our athletes succeed.  We hope they can be the fastest runners, highest jumpers, and best paddlers or shooters in the world.  We secretly hope the crying Russian girl stumbles or the Chinese get slightly out of sync on a dive.  We cheer together for weird sports we've rarely even seen, (trampoline?!) and shout like a coach at the TV when our Americans 'take your mark' on the track.  Not only are we united as a country, we are watching individuals who spend the rest of the year competing against each other, now come together and work as a team.  They depend on each other and work together for the win.  Athletes of different sports are attending their fellow Americans' competitions just to be heard as an American crowd.  Even better, the big picture is a huge competition of people from all around the world who on any other day, might be enemies.  But these two weeks they cheer and hug and pick each other up when one falls down.  They shake hands and congratulate the winner and forget about their differences, even if it's just temporary.

These Olympics have already made history.  I watched the opening ceremonies wondering what drama lay ahead.  Would judges cheat or someone test positive for drugs?  We watched amazing feats such as a man with no legs run a race, history made in women's gymnastics (first African American All-Around gold medalist as well as the first American to win gold in both All-around and team), badminton players disqualified for trying NOT to win, and a legend of a swimmer earn his 22nd Olympic medal to make a statement in Olympic history that may never be broken.  These athletes from around the world include ages 15 to 71.  There are countries I've never heard of being represented.  Countries are being represented by anywhere from 2 athletes, to over 500.  New world records are being set all over the place. 

While the spirit of the competition and the truly amazing ability of these athletes are what draw us to watch, it's the personal stories that steal our heart.  We hear the stories of triumph and failure.  Whether an athlete is overcoming an injury, mishap at a former Olympics, positive drug test, or a barely missed qualification in the past, they celebrate their true achievement of being an Olympian, and just hope for the chance to stand on the medal stand.  Just being there, for a chance to represent their country and compete in the sport they love is a dream come true.

I spent far too much time over the past two weeks watching TV.  I laughed, I cried.  I cheered for the Americans, and when they weren't competing, I cheered for someone else who looked like they deserve the win.  I learned the rules of water polo and feel an odd desire to try white-water kayaking.  I ached, usually in vain, for more coverage of the equestrian events.  I averted my eyes during weightlifting, held my breath during gymnastics, fell asleep during rowing, and paid my bills during some ridiculously long tennis matches.  My kids sat with me to cheer for the US and watch what can happen when you are truly passionate about something and work hard, sacrifice everything, and strive to make your dreams come true.

We will wait another 2 years before the world comes together like this again, and 4 years before another summer games.  Many athletes are already dreaming and training for the next Olympics.  They spend their lives in a strict training regimen of practice, exercise, and diet.  Some are already dreaming of redemption for something gone wrong at these 2012 games.  I admire their dedication, wish them luck in their training, and anxiously await the next time we get to cheer for them as they chase their dreams.

Raising Kids in Dog Shows

This past weekend has been a reminder that I am raising my kids in a sport.  They are learning about life through a type of competition.  I stood and had a conversation with a reputable figure in our breed and she commented on my parenting, as well as the passion that the girls show in the sport.  They want to be there, they aren't doing this for mom.  They are largely among adults who take this sport and love of the breed very seriously.  They have been forced to act in a mature manner as they play an adult's game.  Along the way they are making friendships with other juniors that will last them a lifetime.  They will learn how to win, how to lose, and how best to play the game. More than anything, I want to teach my children to play with honor.  No matter what sport or hobby your family is involved in, there are opportunities to learn good and bad lessons. I can speak at my kids all I want, but they will follow what I do, not what I say.  The best I can do for them is to be an example. 

These are the lessons I hope they learn:

  Hard work in training your dog will reap the best results.  It takes effort and dedication to be successful.  It takes a sacrifice of time and money to follow your passion.  If it is truly your passion, you won't mind what you give up.

 You will lose.  Lose with grace. Congratulate the winners and be truly happy for their success.  We are all there for the same reason, because we hope to win.  Pouting because you didn't win won't change the results.  It's best to rejoice with the winner and hopefully they will celebrate with you when you get the chance to experience the joy of winning. 

You will win.  Win with dignity.  Thank the judge and happily accept congratulations.  Remember that each win is truly an honor and a celebration of your hard work and effort.

Play with honor.  Follow the rules and hold your head high that you are playing an honest game.  As long as you know you are honorable, you have nothing to worry about.  When people attack or question your ethics, you can walk away knowing you are right, and they were wrong to question you. 

Politics are a part of every sport and game.  The strategy of bad-mouthing, back-stabbing, and playing the two-faced friend never has a good ending.  It's better to avoid it all.  The immaturity of high school comes back into play too often in life.  I'd rather win or lose knowing that it was based on the merit of my dog, not because of who I am, who I know, or any tricks I played. 

No matter how much you love the sport, it is never worth a hit to your integrity.  Always keep in perspective what is truly important in life:  your self worth, your faith and values, your family and friends.  Play the game and take the lessons it offers, but never let the game play you.  Always remember who you are and why you are there. 

The dog you came and leave with is valuable because of the love you share, not because of ribbons won.  The dog didn't choose this sport nor ask to go to the show.  Cherish them and take care of their every need as you enjoy the time you spend with them.

Authority figures are to be respected.  Judges, coaches, and leaders have earned the right to our respect.  We must follow their instructions and speak to them with the respect they deserve.

It is better to listen than to speak.  Wisdom comes from experience and from the words of those with experience.  Knowledge will come quicker when you accept advice, rather than trying to figure everything out on your own.  Humbly acknowledge that you don't know everything, that regardless of what you already know, there is always more to learn.

 These are the lessons I hope my children learn in life.  Dog shows are the venue I have to teach these life lessons.  I pray that I can be a positive example to my kids.  I know they have a love for the sport and could continue for a long time.  I would love to continue showing with my adult children.  Along our journey, as they move toward the teen years and adulthood, I hope they become young women and a young gentleman that I can be proud of.  I hope they become positive influences not only in this sport, but in life. 

I will raise my children, not just watch them grow up.  I will guide them with instruction and with discipline. I will guide them with love as we enjoy this adventure in dog shows.

NOT a Stay at Home Mom!

I never thought I could be a stay at home mom.  I wasn't even sure what they did all day, but I did know that I didn't want to be stuck at home that much!  Heck, I didn't even like kids much.  It sounded like some sort of torture to be home with diapers and laundry and bills and daytime television.
That, of course, was before I had my own children.  I went back to work after my first baby.  I loved my job, but hated that someone else had my baby all day.  After my second baby, I quickly went to working part time, and after the third, I quit teaching all together to stay home with the kids.  It was a hard decision, but I was completely at peace with it.  That's when you know it's right.  I had visions of finally getting my house clean and organized, and keeping it that way.  The bills would always be caught up, the checkbook balanced, the meals would be works of art from cookbooks, and I would always be dressed with my hair fixed before the kids woke up in the morning.  During the day I would sit on my clean floor and play puzzles and read books to the kids.  During nap time I would knit a scarf or read a book.  If you are, or ever have been a stay at home mom, you're laughing now.

None of that happened.  I can't keep the house clean, the laundry is never caught up, and my to-do list never seems to get any shorter.  I LOVE my job!  I love that I am with my kids all day and can't imagine doing anything else.  Besides the fact that I have four mess-makers, why can't I get everything done?

I really thought I was just doing it all wrong until my aunt, also a mother of four, made the comment that I really wasn't a stay at home mom.  I am an 'On-The-Go' mom!  Ah Ha!  That's the problem.  In order to have a clean house and cook big elaborate meals, you must actually be IN the house!  I'm rarely at home!  Sure, the first few years of your child's life are based around the house.  But soon enough, your little ones are heading off to Vacation Bible School, T-ball practice, ballet class, or piano lessons.  Then come the invitations to friends' birthday parties, choir practice, and now the sports have practices AND games/meets.  Whoa, now add in summer camps and school field trips and 4-H and more sports... 

That's just one kid.  I have four.  And that's just the kids' schedule. I'm proud to say that I still have a life too!  I have dog shows and...., and..... well I just seem to have dog shows.  But that keeps me VERY busy!  I compete two or three weekends a month, and several of those are out of town stays.  I feel like I'm always packing or unpacking.  As a family we have church, family get-togethers, weekend camping trips, and a week-long vacation.  My calendar is filled with notations.  It's rare to ever see a day without something written on it.  Our six lives are filled with adventures and commitments.  Sure we could cut some out.  We could sit home and play puzzles on the floor, but this is the life we have chosen and love.
That's not to say that I don't get to sit down and play with the kids.  I love to read them books and cuddle each one on the couch.  But it's much more likely that I will spend time chatting with one of my older girls about life on the drive to a dog show.  I'll laugh and hold hands with Drew on a hike during a camping trip.  Macy will fall asleep in my arms on a boat in the middle of a lake on vacation.  My most vivid memories may not be made at home, but rather in those moments when we are away from our house.

 I may be technically a 'Stay At Home Mom' by name, but good luck finding me there!

The Adventures of Drew. Part 2

**I've had some technical difficulties and haven't been able to post for a few weeks.  Hopefully I can get my laptop and this website to get along!

Tim asked me last night if I could have guessed how special my little boy would be to me before becoming a parent.  I said definitely not. I wasn't raised around boys and had always dreamed of having little girls.  When they laid that tiny little baby boy in my arms, my heart melted and my life changed.  Never have I kissed a baby as much as I did Drew.  He's certainly different than my girls, but so special to this momma's heart! 

And then there are days that he drives me nuts! 

   I remember the winter he had a bad cold, one of those where his nose was running constantly.  We taught him to blow his own nose and were proud that he was so independent in taking care of that chore.  It was a few days into the cold that I stopped to inspect his 'tissue', only to realize that he was using Swiffer sweeper cloths to blow his nose!  The box was nearly empty!  Any Swiffer fan knows how much those darn things cost!!

I knew I was truly broken in as a mom after one particular trip to Sears.  My mom and I had taken the 4 kids to get their Christmas picture taken.  I had baby Macy in a stroller and was trying to make her happy in her cute little dress.  Madie and Emma had wandered off with my mom to look at the pretty clothes in the girls department.  Drew was interacting with a mannequin model.  She was headless, and wearing a shorter skirt than my girls will ever wear.  Drew decided to climb up on the pedestal with her and started belting out a song that made perfect sense only to a two year old.  He was dancing and bopping when his poor headless lady friend went flying!  She ended up on her shoulders (no head) and the little skirt flipped up.  Drew jumped down to retrieve his lady friend, hoisting her back up on her stand into the upright position.  I was barely paying attention to all of this, but was impressed and grateful that he had righted the situation without my assistance.  With one last shove, Drew sticks up his little hand and shouts "STAY" at the plastic lady, and wandered away like it was no big deal. 

I was sitting on the couch one day when Drew came over and kindly put chapstick on my lips.  What a sweet boy!  Then he motioned to our old schnauzer who was laying in her chair with a somewhat annoyed expression and said, "I put on Abbi face too!"   Lovely.

The first White-out adventure made a reputation for Drew.  I also got to hear a lot of White-out jokes and threats of gifting Drew with a case of white out.  It was the SECOND White-out adventure that really sealed the deal.  Poor Drew now has a restraining order from the stuff, not allowed within 10 feet. 
Tim and I were sitting in the living room chatting when we realized the two 'little ones' were being very quiet.  I said I was sure they had just gone into the kitchen, which meant they were just a few feet away.  I walked into the room to find the two of them on the floor.  Drew was covered in White-out and in the process of giving Macy a matching paint job.  Of course I had to grab the camera.

One of Drew's biggest misadventures didn't even require him to be present at the moment.  I was getting ready for bed and went into the upstairs bathroom to remove my contacts.  I couldn't find my glasses or contact case.  There were some other odds and ends missing too.  I usually sat these things on the windowsill and noticed the window was open.  With one last look around the bathroom, I sighed and stuck my head out the window.  As I suspected, on the porch roof below the window sat my glasses case, contact case, as well as some random toys.  Random BOY toys.  I had no doubt who the suspect was.  I needed those items.  The bathroom window is small, not designed for human beings to be crawling in and out of, but I figured I could manage it.  I stepped up on the tub and awkwardly stuck my legs out the window and dropped to the porch roof.  I quickly realized that the roof of the porch is much lower than the inside floor of the bathroom.  The windowsill was now nearly at my neck.  I picked up the various items and tossed them back into the bathroom and contemplated my situation.  It was nearly midnight and I had a bedroom on each side with two sleeping kids in each of them.  Tim had already gone to bed downstairs and probably wouldn't hear me even if I did start yelling for help.  I decided against jumping off the roof of the porch, and I definitely wasn't dressed for a fire rescue team.  I had a moment where I imagined my family finding me the next morning, shivering outside the window.  I finally decided that I had to find a way to get back in the window.  With a lot of jumping, flailing, struggling, and kicking the side of the house on my way up, I was able to fling my body into the tiny window far enough to wiggle in so that I was hanging half in, half out.  I am SO thankful that we do not have any neighbors to the west of our house to see that sight!!  At that point I realized there was no way to swing a leg through to land on my feet, so it was with an ungraceful 'thump' that I landed back in the bathroom with a scraped belly and very little dignity remaining. 

As Drew sits here snuggled up next to me,  I can't imagine life without him.  Through all of his crazy adventures, he has a heart of gold.  He's the first to run to comfort when someone is sad.  He gives me random hugs now and then, 'just because'.  He is full of laughter and joy, energy and inquisitiveness, just as a little boy should be.  He stole my heart from day one.  God gave us this child to keep us humble and to make us laugh.  I am forever grateful and even look forward to whatever new stories he will bring.

The Adventures of Drew, part 1.

I've done some serious posts lately and thought it was time for a bit of levity. It's time for some Drew stories! Over the past two years, I've noticed that Drew stories come in threes. Just when I think the boy has settled down and things will be 'normal', he suddenly pulls out a serious of Drew adventures that make good story material. I should knock on wood before I say this, but he hasn't been up to much mischief lately. We'll have to see how long this dry spell lasts. Here are a few 'oldies but goodies'...

As soon as Drew could walk we knew we had a character on our hands. One my first memories of his 'big boy' adventures was when he was around a year old. I found him in the bathroom with his two sisters who were screaming in the shower. He kept flushing the toilet, stealing the hot water from their steamy shower. When they screamed, he would laugh so hard he would double over. Evil little toddler! This may have been the day Drew went from being their adorable baby, to an annoying little brother!

One day I was sitting at my computer desk, working on the computer. Little Drew toddled into the room with a mischievous grin on his face. He had recently started putting things in his mouth. He didn't chew or swallow, just carried them around in his mouth. I could tell by his mouth and the sparkle in his eye that he had something. I called him over to me and told him to open his mouth. He obediently opened and stuck out his tongue. There sitting on his tongue, very clean and shiny, was my wedding ring. There is a time to scold a naughty child, and there is a time to smile and carefully move closer until you can snatch your jewelry out of his face!!

Drew has always loved our litters of puppies. I remember him when he was in his walker, wandering down the hall to the laundry room. He spent many hours there with his tiny fingers through the x-pen bars for the puppies to kiss. It didn't take long for him to repay the generous nature of puppies. It was the next litter when he woke us to a stampede of puppies. Tiny puppy feet stomping down the hall on the wooden floor, followed by tiny toddler feet. When he woke up, instead of coming into our room, he just decided it would be fun to release the litter of puppies and run around the house. They were all having SO much fun!

I read in a magazine that your face cream will stay fresher if you keep it in the refrigerator. Ever since adding a male child to our family, I seem to be getting fine lines. In every attempt to avoid wrinkles before my time, I use special moisturizer on my face. In every attempt to preserve and maximize its efficiency, I keep my face cream in the fridge. It's unfortunate that toddlers can't read. Face cream appears to a two year old to be a yummy snack. I found him sitting on the floor with an open refrigerator door, snacking on my anti-wrinkle cream. I hadn't thought of that method of application. No wrinkles for Drew! Lesson learned, not everything in the refrigerator is edible!

Drew's most famous escapade may be his adventures with White-out. Ah, but which episode you ask? Well you'll have to wait for the sequel until another blog. This one is the original. You know how they say to never trust a quiet child? I learned my lesson quickly with that one. Just one day after watching his two older sisters paint their toes, Drew disappeared upstairs by himself. A few minutes later I go to check on him, and find myself following white footsteps on the stairs, past a large white puddle smeared into the upstairs hall, and into the bathroom. A little boy with white toes, white legs, white hands, face, clothes.... The mom in me, the mom that was not yet used to mothering a little boy, grabs him and puts him in the tub. Some soap, water, and scrubbing later, I discover that White off does not wash off! Quickly accepting our fate, I redress the child and snap a few photos. He's thrilled with his new look. The white blob on the floor remains in our upstairs hall to this day.

I'll have to stop there for the night, but don't worry, I'm not out of Drew stories! There have been a few times when I've almost missed the humor of a Drew story. I've now become so used to his antics that they fail to phase me. It's only when I step back, having survived with some dignity still intact, that I realize the humor. I am always quick to point out that the boy never means any harm! He has a heart of gold and just falls into these situations quite innocently. While that is definitely part of his charm, it's also part of the entertainment!
I treasure these memories of my little buddy!

More Drew stories coming soon!

How are those New Year's Resolutions working out?

I'm probably very similar to other people in that I make big plans and goals on January 1st, only to let them fade and be forgotten. This year, I have a public record of my 5 New Year's Resolutions. Three months of this year have already passed. It's time to check in on my progress and see if my goals are being met. I've decided to give myself a report card.

1. Write a weekly blog. I'm going to give myself an A on the blogging! I set the goal to blog once a week, even said I'd post them on Tuesdays, and I've done a pretty good job of sticking to that! Only once did I miss my deadline when I had a post wiped out because of computer problems. I still got that one posted the next day that I was on the computer. The only problem I have with the blog is my nasty habit of procrastination. Sometimes I feel like I'm back in college with a paper due at my 8:30am class on Friday. I tend to wait and whip something out Thursday night. (Back in my day, we had to have the thing printed and neatly presented for class. We didn't have the luxury of emailing it to our professor by a midnight deadline!) You can often find me right here, typing away on a Tuesday night to meet my self-imposed deadline. I very well know that if I had started earlier, with more time to rethink, revise, and edit, the end quality would be better. Still, I'm satisfied with the work I'm putting out and think I should pass the class. =)

2. I'm going to give myself a C on my health goal. I wanted to lose weight, exercise more, and eat better. I haven't really lost any weight, just maintained. I do exercise pretty consistently, and better now that the weather is warmer. My diet is my weak point. I love yummy food. I don't do well with portion control, especially when it comes to my favorite yummy foods. Probably my biggest weakness would be my love for sweets. I love desserts, especially chocolate. My best strategy is to record the foods I eat. As long as I have to write down everything I eat, and how much, I feel more accountable and better able to resist temptation. I started out the year writing everything down, but haven't continued with that. I prefer to just eat whatever I want. I do realize that's not best for my body and will try to improve in this area.

3. Bible Study. I'm going to be honest and give myself a D on Bible Study. While we've done pretty well with Church attendance this year, and we uphold our daily prayers and walk with God, I've been pretty bad about reading my Bible! I'm going to move the Bible to the top of my pile of books by the bed and try to improve on this. This goal only takes a few minutes a day to achieve and certainly shouldn't be the area where I'm failing!

4. Organization. I get a B on this on! I've actually made some improvements in my life to get things in order. Paperwork has been my big nemesis. I have piles of paperwork everywhere. You name it: bills, papers from school, 4-H stuff, ASCA club stuff, and tons of dog papers. I went and bought 4 portable file boxes. One is for 4-H, divided up by the different projects the girls do. Another is for the dogs, one folder per dog. I already had a file system for them, but this one is updated and easier to keep handy. Another file is for each litter and the breeding program. I have a folder for the paperwork involved from each litter, as well as for my stud dogs, and one file for all of the paperwork that goes into the puppy binders. The last file box is just mine. It's a miscellaneous collection of all of the paperwork that sits around and has nowhere to go. School papers, club papers, bills, and on and on. I'm very happy with my new system. I also made up new dog binders, organizing all of their registrations, health clearances, titles, etc. That makes it so much easier to find everything. I still have a long way to go in getting my life and house organized, but I am happy with the progress.

5. Goals with dogs. I get a B+ on this one! I have several goals in training and certain titles I want this year. The main four titles I'm after are 4 big ones! I want a MACH, ATCH, ASCA CH., and AKC CH. It's the first of April and while I haven't achieved any of those titles yet, I have made some good progress!! Ryder got a major in AKC, meaning he just needs a 4 point major to finish his CH. Quinn picked up a major in ASCA, meaning he just needs 2 point to finish his CH. I'd have to look, but I know Glory has earned at least two QQ's so far this year towards her MACH. We haven't had any ASCA agility trials yet, so no progress on the ATCH yet. I'm always happy with progress, it takes me a step closer to the goal!

We're only a fourth of the way through this year. I've already seen great things happen and am in no hurry to see this year rush by. My goals are just that, things that I strive to achieve. If I reach the end of the year and haven't accomplished them, they can be next year's goals! For now, I'll continue to work on my resolutions, they give me focus and bring me joy, peace, and satisfaction. They cover many different areas of my life and can only help me become a better person. I'll check back in a few months and see how things are going at the halfway mark. Until then, carry on and keep reaching for those goals!